she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
