i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I would fuck him just for his dog
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
