Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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