Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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