sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
nutella sex= disaster
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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