I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Randomize
