Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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