How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
