My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
