sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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