Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
it's like iHOP with fire
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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