i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Randomize
