I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize