Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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