question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
