Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize