What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
