I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Randomize
