Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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