I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
