sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize