I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
