oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
