whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
