That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
