I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize