And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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