office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
