she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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