Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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