Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Houston, we have a blender
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
