you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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