thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
His nipple licking is glorious
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