Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
