People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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