I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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