Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
