Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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