you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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