So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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