Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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