I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
