haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
We are all done wearing pants today
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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