i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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