I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
she told me i tasted like america
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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