So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize