I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
