I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
