we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize