So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
