oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
