belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He better not be in your backpack
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
